Grading Scale

My report card for the semester just came in. It always entertains me, coming from a relatively successful family, to notice the grading scale on the bottom of the page. It looks like this:

A - Excellent

B - Above Average

C - Average

D - Below Average

E - Faliure

I guess the reason I find this so entertaining is that I look at a C as a "Failure". Here's my parents' grading scale:

A - What You Should Be Getting

B - Mostly What You Are Getting

C - Failure

D - Their Computer Must Be Broken

E - Don't Even Look At Me You Unworthy Child

As a mostly A-B range student, I'm TERRIFIED of getting anything below a solid B. B- is too close to C, which would earn me The Stern Look, and the "Don't You Want To Get In To Northwestern?" speech. The answer is yes, I do, and the reason this speech became one of my mom's weapons is because my councilor, John, outright told me that, because of my GPA (about 3.5, 3.6) it's an unreasonable goal to try to get in to Northwestern. When my mom heard that, her reaction was basically "challenge accepted!"...

He's not actually a bad councilor...He's just...depressing.

For the record, I only have one B this semester, and the rest are some variation of the letter A. In case you care.

The point of this post is to put it on record, right now, that I am going to get straight A's next year and I am GOING to get in to Northwestern, damn it!

So, John, challenge accepted!

A New Experiment, Also Chicago, Also The Red Sox

I'm doing an experiment called "see how long it takes for my keyboard to stop working again". Currently my keyboard is just randomly working. (Last summer I spilled root beer on my computer, and at some point in the middle of this school year it stopped working. It was quite sad.) I've had a desktop keyboard plugged into my laptop (making it quite un-portable) but the keyboard was shoved to the side so I could watch some videos, and I hit Apple-W on the laptop keyboard because it was available (even though I knew it shouldn't work) and SURPRISE it worked!

I know that was a really confusing paragraph, but the point is my keyboard has been broken and now it is not anymore. For the time being.

The keys that were broken, for your interest, were q, w, e, r, t, y, u, i, and o. every letter in the top row except p. "tab" worked, as well as the brackets and the backslash. It was just those nine letters that were failing.

Anyway, now I'm wondering how long it will last. This keyboard is a lot more easy to use than the desktop keyboard (the desktop keyboard is BIG and CLUNKY, and the laptop keyboard is sleek and elegant) and I'm hoping that the reversal is permanent.

Or at least semi-permanent enough to make it through July so I can bring my computer to Chicago with me without having to carry around a big clunky ugly fail keyboard.

(Hey did I tell you guys I'm going to Chicago this summer? I got into a film program and I will be acting ON CAMERA for a whole month! In Chicago(Evanston) Illinois!)

Hopefully I will be able to either get a new computer (unlikely) or get a more sleek, wireless keyboard to carry around instead of the BIG, UGLY, CLUNKY one I have now.

So there's that.

Also, I love the Red Sox. They are "my team". I had a dream that they traded Dustin Pedroia (my favorite player) to the Yankees (RIVALS). In my dream the Sox and Yanks were playing a game in my home town (neither Boston nor New York, so I don't know why that...dream logic, don't question it.) I had made a sign that says "I don't root for the Red Sox or the Yankees. Go Dustin!" and somehow Dustin Pedroia saw it all the way from home plate when he was at bat and he was like "dude, chick" and Wakefield was pitching and he was like, "dude, chick" too because even though now Dustin's playing for the Yanks he and all of the Sox are still the bestest of friends.

(My keyboard's starting to fail a little, ohs nos.)

So anyway after the game Dustin came up to me and he was like "hey, you're that chick" and I was like "In dreams I am unimaginably clever and everyone always loves me" and he was all "wow you're so clever!" It was actually pretty great.

Anyway, I think that dream may have come from when I asked my sister "What would you do if the Red Sox traded Jacoby Ellsbury (her favorite player) to the Yankees?" and she said "It would be so heartbreaking, but I would root for the Red Sox until Jacoby was up at bat, and I would probably cheer if he made a good play or something".

Now I'm rambling. I meant to simply introduce my love of the Red Sox and then move on, but I got stuck in the memory of my dream and there is no excuse for my behavior!

Anyway, the Red Sox are going to be playing the Chicago White Sox July 29, 30, and 31, and my film program ends July 29 (at night) so MAYBE we'll get to see my favorite team in my favorite town the day after I finish my summer program on acting, my favorite thing!

...I'm crazy.

We're done now.

Boyfriend, Playlist, and Shampoo

Have you ever played the game where you try to come up with three things you could buy at a store to confuse the checkout clerk? If a boyfriend and a playlist were things one could buy, I think I would win. Though in a world where one can buy a boyfriend at a store, it may also be possible to buy a T-Rex, and then I would probably loose to whoever comes up with that, 100 Christmas Tree lights, and an Osama Bin Laden plushie.

Was that intro entertaining enough to distract you from the fact that I haven't posted in forever? No? Then I must apologize for not having posted in forever.

Sorry it’s been forever since I posted. It’s sort of the same thing that happened to me when I lost the role in Romeo and Juliet, except instead of the role it’s Boyfriend, and instead of the play, it’s life. Basically I decided not to post for a while and wait until I’m not liable to go into a flaming internet-rage at Ex (damn it, I told Megan not to call him “Ex” for fear it would catch) and end up upsetting several people in the process… And now I’ve got a crush on the boy who ended up STEALING MY ROLE (and doing a better job than I ever could have, meep) so there’s that.

Tangent over. Anyway…

So instead of blogging for a month or so I made a “Breakup Playlist” and listened to it for a while. Then the show we were in together ended so I haven’t seen him for almost a week. I think I’ve cooled down enough to make a post without fear of slipping into Ex-Girlfriend RAGE Mode.

Here’s my Breakup Playlist:

• Learning To Fall — Boys Like Girls

• You Won’t See Me — The Beatles

• As Your Ghost Takes Flight — Saves The Day

• Everything We Had — The Academy Is…

• Heads Up, Hearts Down — I Fight Dragons

• Love Love, Kiss Kiss — Alkaline Trio

• You’re So Vain — Carly Simon

• The Old Apartment — Barenaked Ladies

• Not I — I Fight Dragons

• The Middle — Jimmy Eat World

• Give It Up — I Fight Dragons

• Blind — Ke$ha

• Too Much Too Soon — Green Day

• The Process — I Fight Dragons

• Let It Be — The Beatles

• Go Home — Barenaked Ladies

• Good Riddance — Green Day

I actually just spent kind of a while fixing the playlist. There weren’t enough songs, and they weren’t really in a great order, and etcetera… I’m pretty proud of it now. It’s supposed to go from negative, sad, whiney songs to positive, get-over-yourself songs. The placement of “Blind” is questionable, but ultimately it’s a “positive” song. Also I really needed more than one song between Give It Up and The Process, because they’re by the same person. Also don’t pay too much attention when you listen to The Middle and Give It Up one right after the other, because they’re BASICALLY the same thing… So there’s that…

Now it’s time for part three!

(Part one being the boyfriend and part two being the playlist)

Part two is about this new shampoo/conditioner pair I found by Herbal Essences. The company’s pretty good, and recently I’ve been using their “color treated” formula because I went blond. Well I bought a new formula, partially because I was bored of the color treated formula, and partially because the new one is in a purple bottle. Like, hot purple.

It looks like grape soda!!

So I saw the bottle and was immediately drawn to its color like a fly to a decomposing body. It’s called “Tousle Me Softly”, for a “tousled look”. It also smells good.

I didn’t actually buy it because I wanted to achieve a “tousled look”, but that night when I got home and took a shower, my hair was noticeably different. It’s like, the shampoo and conditioner actually do what they’re supposed to! They don’t just clean your hair and make you smell pretty.

The shampoo sort of…almost tangled my hair. Both the shampoo and conditioner seem to dry my hair more than other shampoos and conditioners. The conditioner even almost leaves a sticky feel when it washes out.

So I guess all of this seems very unappealing in my description... Well, here's a picture of me before I started using the "tousled look" formula:

And here's a picture of after:

I guess you can't really tell the difference, but trust me, it’s awesome. My hair is just...more dry and separated now. It's really, really nice. I love it so very much, and as long as my hair is short I will never use any other shampoo or conditioner ever.

Profile Question and also Rhinoceros

Profile Question

On the "edit profile" page of this site, one can answer a random question to appear on his or her profile. I was changing the random question so quickly that I accidentally skipped over a very controversial question to which I have quite a strong opinion. I spent about a half hour refreshing the page, trying to get that question back, but to no avail.

So I decided to make a post to answer that question. The question is as follows:

"Do you believe forks evolved from spoons?"

NO! YOU IDIOTS!

It's the other way about (probably).

See, the first humans ate MEAT (probably), not soup (probably). Therefore they would have (probably) developed the fork first, or at least a fork-like object. After that, they would have (probably) realized, "Hey, we can (probably) make this more solid and scoopey and eat soup!"

At least that (probably) makes more sense than spoon—>fork does...

Rhinoceros

Sorry I said "It's the other way about" earlier in this post. I'm doing a show called Rhinoceros by Eugine Ionesco, and that line is in the play, and so now it's in my mind.

My Birthday, NOT the "Royal Wedding"

I thought I'd share with you a few of my most recent Twitter posts:

Guys, you do realize that the British royalty are the ones who made us Americans? Stop fangirling over the prince and his wedding.

Wait wait wait, Friday? Those losers are getting married on FRIDAY!? They're stealing my birthday!

Okay, fair warning, if anyone says "your birthday's on the same day as the Royal Wedding", I will slap you.

GOD DAMN IT, the wedding's on the same day as my birthday, not the other way around!

It was my birthday before it was your anniversary Willy, just you remember that.

AND IF ANYBODY sings the Friday song on my birthday, I will slap you SEVEN TIMES! One for each day of the week! Fair warning.

I can remember all the days in the week, even if Rebecca Black can't.

Why did those loser Brits have to steal my birthday... :(

But seriously Willy, congrats. God save the president.

The Woes of Pantyhose

It is my opinion as of Sunday, April 23rd, 2011, that there are only two excuses for pantyhose. (Don't hold me to that in a few years; my opinions have been known to change. I used to firmly believe that there was never any excuse for leggings to be worn as pants, but I am now the proud owner of two pairs of "Jeggings", one of which I am wearing right now.)

Anyway, as of right now, I believe there are only two reasons to wear pantyhose. They are as follows:

1. Theater

I never wore pantyhose EVER before I started high school theater and it became a requirement for every girl to wear pantyhose. (Not sure why that is).

2. Church/Parties

I lump the two together because both usually require you to look good in someone else's house.

Other than those two instances, I can't think of any other example of me wearing pantyhose.

Let's go back to No. 1 for a moment. Theater. Seeing as I never wore pantyhose before I started theater, I never owned any. When I did my first show, my mom and I went out and bought two pairs of pantyhose. They were both ripped and unusable by the time the show ended, so when the next show came around I had to go out and buy two more pairs. This became a sort of tradition for me. When dress rehearsals came around, my mom and I went out and bought two pairs of pantyhose.

Somehow my two pairs from Little Shop came out relatively unscathed, and the same with my two pairs from Pride and Prejudice at the end of last year. I didn't need any for Romeo and Juliet since I was playing a boy, and we haven't gotten into dress rehearsals for Rhinoceros yet, so I haven't had to use them since Little Shop.

Now, on a stage one can usually get away with having one or two tears in a pair of pantyhose, but in church it's not quite so simple. People are closer, and they will JUDGE those tears. So you really need to have either a brand new pair, or a pair that you have kept in such good shape that they are immaculate anyway.

Well it's Easter today, which requires church-going.

My family doesn't go to church as often as we should. Maybe if we went more or less every week I'd have more good pairs of pantyhose.

But we don't.

And I don't.

Out of my four leftover pairs, none of them are immaculate.

I pulled them out of my drawer one at a time and examined each for holes. The first three had small tears on the legs which would be fine for the stage, but, again, not for church.

Finally, the last pair I pulled out looked pretty good, except for a bit of wear at the toes. But really no one was going to be looking at my toes.

But you're not just standing or walking around at church, as you would be at a party. At church you sit down, kneel down, sit up, stand up, sit, stand, sit, stand, kneel, sit, kneel, stand, etc. For over an hour.

Pantyhose aren't very strong. It's amazing how fast they can grow a rip. After an hour, the little tear that was at my toe at the beginning of church had grown all the way up to my knee by the end.

FFFFFFF!!

I have now retired yet another pair of pantyhose.

At least Jeggings don't tear.

PIXIES

So last night Eli and I went to see the Pixies. Since obviously everyone knows who the Pixies are, I don't have to talk about how awesome the concert was. All I really have to say (other than "it was awesome") is that I got a shirt:

But you probably don't all know about Imaginary Cities. They're the band who opened for the Pixies last night, and they were REALLY awesome. They're also new—I think they said they were 8 months old—which is impressive.

I tried to hide a link in that image, but it didn't work, so I'm going to hide it in the word "here" instead. You'll never find it! It's such a good hiding job.

Anyway, you should check them out, because they are basically the most awesome ever. Yeah.